Thursday 13

13 things I would do if I won the lotto.

1. Pay off my outstanding debts. Medical bills and credit cards. Note to self, never pay medical bills with a credit card;)

2. Pay off the cars. Having two car payments in ridiculous but in our case, very necessary. One for work and one for getting me to and from appointments. The sad part is Im not even allowed to drive.

3. Put away some money for our kids. To buy what ever it is they need. I hate not being able to buy them all the cool things because the money went to my medical bills and medication. I’m afraid one day they will resent me for it.

4. Help out family. Our parents have helped us out so many times, it would be nice to give back to them. Payback all the free rent they have given us. The food they have bought us and for the bills they have covered for us.

5. Buy a house of our own. God what I would do to have this. I don’t need anything fancy. Just a place to call home. Where the boys can be boys, where I can eat in bed if I want to and where I make the rules :)

6. Help my little sister out. Buy her a car, rent her an apartment, help pay her college tuition. Our bond is one more than sisters, she is like a daughter to me and it kills me that I cant be there for her like I want to be.

7. Go on a vacation. A real vacation. Where we stay where we choose, eat local food, relax and do whatever we feel like doing. I would love to do another cruise. Or go back to Hawaii and pretend like I haven’t been there a million times. Or just take a road trip to the beach. I just want to get away for a little while.

8. Spurs season tickets for my husband. Or Cowboys tickets. Either way I know he would enjoy himself. He works so hard to support and take care of us, that he deserves something for him.

9. Go home next year. Unlikely, because of money and medical reasons, but my baby sister is going to be graduating from High School. I hate that I cant promise her Ill be there. I don’t want to miss it.

10. Have a real wedding. With a dress and family and friends. Not that I don’t cherish the day we did get married, but at the time, we just wanted to be husband and wife. Maybe after my transplant and when things settle down, we can renew our vows. A fresh start after all the things we have made it though.

11. Have another baby. We want another baby. I always wanted a big family. I’m talking 6 kids. But after years of debate, we settled on a max of 4. I let fear of another miscarriage keep me from enjoying being pregnant with my oldest. And with my second son, I was passed around doctors like the newest and coolest exhibit. Everyone wanted to poke around and scan and see what was going on. I would love to have just one, normal, uneventful, full term, healthy pregnancy. Just once more. Why do I need to win the lotto to do this? Oh yeah, because kids are expensive.

12. Start my own photography business. I enjoy photography so much. Especially children. I look back at the photos I have of my boys and want to give that to others. We forget about all the little things, the faces they make, the way they sleep, their favorite toys. I have pictures of these plus more that I look back on and remember that exact moment in time.

13. Donate. There are so many great charities out there. Though the course of my illness, I have found so many. And its sad how many people out there could help, but don’t. And not only to charities, but to our schools and research. I would probably end up giving money away to perfect strangers. I would love to be able to give back to those who really need it.